the boathand’s lover’s pipedream.

you were always the leaver

(made me the unwitting receiver),

calling the shots and writing the rules.

your return was my breather,

my attachment, reliever;

calling the shots and writing the rules.

you started dreaming of leaving on a big ship steaming

(with no idea or goal in sight),

it was my concern you quick return,

knowing you won’t, but hoping you might.

sat up all night tryna figure it out

decoding your riddles never felt so hard;

i wish you’d just speak up, scream or shout—

if you were right here now you’d feel so far.